There is an old saying you hear quite often that “proper
preparation predicts perfect performance”. The flip side of this is the warning
that “poor preparation precedes pathetic performance”.
With these two thoughts in mind, I decided to get off my
keester and into the garage to do a proper nut-and-bolt inspection of my 1987
Porsche 930 (the “Dirty 930”) to get ready for Targa California 2013.
The Targa California is an event “disorganized” by long time
Porsche guru Dave Bouzaglou from TRE Motorsports in Van Nuys, CA. Dave was one
of the miscreants roaring up and down Mulholland Drive in the 1970’s and still
spends a great deal of time hooning around the back roads of the Golden State
so he is a certified B-road expert. Each year he picks out a route for 100 or
so of his closest friends to enjoy behind the wheels of all sorts of vintage
motors with neat stops along the ways and bench racing gatherings in the
evenings.
A big part of enjoying the Targa is having a reliable car
that does not leave you sitting alongside a very peaceful country lane
contemplating the nature of your mechanical travail. Even worse is having a
mechanical problem that ends up with you performing Bikram yoga moves to extract
yourself from a crunched car serenely settled in a select part of the
picturesque California landscape.
So as not to end up in one of those states, I began the
in-depth inspection of Ol’ Dirty to make sure all was in proper fettle. I have
been driving the car almost daily for a few weeks to note any strange behavior
but other than a squeaky A/C compressor (fixed by removing the belt) she ran as
a properly sorted 930 of her era should. Boost was good, shifts were crisp, and
the handling was its usual tricky self.
A good nut-and-bolter starts with the car in the air with
its wheels removed and all the tender bits exposed to the harsh glare of an
inspection light. Here you can see Dirty making like she had spent the night in
a bad part of town with her Fuchs long gone.
The key systems to inspect are brakes, suspension, ignition,
fuel, motor, transmission, and steering. Although the Targa does not run during
the nighttime hours, you will also want to check your lamps and also ensure all
the electrics that help with the weather are working well as the coastal route
of the Targa can often serve up some unpredictable weather at times. I have
seen rain, snow, mud, cows, and grasshopper swarms so make sure the wipers work
well.
The first thing to look for while you are crawling around is
any disturbance in the force, er, dirt that is usually under most cars. Do you
see something that is too clean? Fluid leaking where there was nothing before?
No fluid where there used to be a healthy leak? All of these things point towards
something that is going to go ka-bang 15 miles south of BFE so poke, prod, and
pull to see if you can figure out what might be amiss.
The next task is to put a wrench, screwdriver, or socket on
everything you can see that can fit a wrench, screwdriver, or socket. Oil
fittings, drain plugs, axle bolts, trans mounts, engine mounts, coolant hoses,
and anything else that could loosen up and fall off should get a quick turn of
the wrench to make sure all is snug. While you are touring around under bonnet
you should also take a quick look at any belts to make sure they are not
glazed, fraying or cracking. I failed to catch a leaky intercooler seal last
year so I had an inconsistent idle and oil leaks all over the engine
compartment that only stopped when I duct taped all the intercooler fittings
together in the truest Ricky Bobby spirit.
Once all is well there, you need to pay attention to your
dearest’s vital fluids. You should plan on an oil change, trans fluid refresh,
coolant service, and brake and or clutch master fluid flush to get any crunky
old lubricants or fluids out of there and filled with new to ensure all is well
and ready for service. Dirty had just had an oil change with valve adjust and a
trans rebuild within the last 300 miles so I mainly concerned myself with the
brake fluid as coolant is verboten in an oil cooled ass engine Nazi slot car.
Once you have all that done, a nice bath and good cleaning
of the inside is in order. Start the trip clean so you aren’t enjoying funky
smells and grimy windows. The car will most likely come home filthy but at
least you can begin the event squeaky clean and ready for fun. You should also
find a stained old duffle bag than can hold some key spares like fuses, relays,
oil, brake fluid, and perhaps other items that are known to crump from time to
time on your particular sort of ride.
So, hopefully my prep was good and Dirty is now ready for
1,000 miles of the Targa California. Check @gearheadtourist on Twitter for
updates-hopefully none involve a flatbed or pictures of me hiking along in the
twilight with my thumb out…
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